Here we are 3 months into the new year and I’m willing to bet that many of you have fallen off the resolution, goals, intention bandwagon. One reason people struggle with goals is because they created goals they thought they should achieve! A different more powerful way to set your goals is to determine your “why”.
It’s one thing to create a goal because it’s something you want. It’s entirely different when you create a goal because you have to. Often we don’t even know why we want what we say we want. And, often what we say we want isn’t, in fact, what we do want. What is it that you really want? And, why do you want it?
So, it’s time for a re-boot. What is a goal you want to achieve? Since so many people have trouble figuring out what they want, here are a few tips.
I know this sounds very simple, but when you set a goal, ask yourself the following question – Why do you want it? Ask that question over and over until you arrive at the “why” that energizes you. It often takes being curious and letting yourself explore layer after layer before you discover your true why.
For example, I want to do more speaking this year about Life Energies.
- Why? Because I want people to feel better about themselves.
- Why? Because when you are focused on your strengths rather than your weaknesses, you can be more effective.
- Why? Because when you are more effective and doing things in a way that aligns with you, you are happier and have fewer judgments about yourself.
- So, why do you want to do more speaking? Because I remember how powerful it was for me when I was in my first Aliveness group and had the reaction of, “There’s nothing wrong with me. There’s a whole group of people who think just like I do!”
- Why does that help people in business? Because they can concentrate on what they do really well and either delegate the rest or learn ways to do those things more easily, in a way that makes sense to them. Work becomes more productive and fun.
You could also ask, “so that…?” For example, you may have a goal of generating 10% more income than the previous year. Admirable, but it often gets stalled out because you haven’t discerned your why. It might be that you want to earn that extra 10%;
- so that you can go on your dream vacation,
- so that you will be recognized as a leader,
- so that you can mentor more people and create a legacy of change in your field of business,
- so that you can be more philanthropic,
- so that you can build your business and hire more people, thus helping them provide for their families,
- so that people’s lives will be easier because of your product.
The “why” and “so that” don’t have to be logical. They only have to be true for you. For example, if money is not a motivator for you, then simply setting a money goal will not move you toward achieving it. The question of “so that” helps you frame why you want to do something. You can link your “why” and “so that” to create a plan toward achieving a goal that has meaning to you.
When you don’t have a powerful “why” it is difficult to sustain what you’ve said you wanted. There is nothing that will help pull you through the times when it’s tough to even remember what you wanted to do.
It’s so easy for people to judge themselves and think they never follow through, they can’t be depended upon, they simply aren’t good enough. Here’s the reality, when you set goals that you don’t have any connection to, not only is it difficult to complete those goals, it’s also difficult to even remember what they are.
So, be curious, ask yourself a lot of questions, don’t judge any answers that come to you. Simply ask more questions. You might feel silly, repeatedly asking yourself “why” or “so that” and you might even feel like you are going in circles. This process helps get your logical mind out of the way and get connected to your inner self and what you really want for yourself and for others. Try it and let me know what you discover.