What happens when you shift from feeling frustrated to embracing “what is” and getting to a place of choice? I’m at O’Hare for the second time this week, for the same flight. The first one was canceled after I got here for a 7:00 a.m. flight, so you do the math about when I got up! We rebooked for this morning, same time. The flight was delayed until noon – after we got to the gate. At first, I defaulted to, “Really, you have got to be kidding me!” Their apology was a food voucher, so I got a mocha, with an extra shot!
I quickly shifted into embracing the free mocha rather than being frustrated that we were delayed by 2 days and 5 hours! I know it sounds ridiculous, but I decided in that moment to go with the flow rather than resisting what was happening. Besides it was a great metaphor to write about!
It goes back to the basics of “what is” from Living on Purpose – what is true and what choices do you have? Railing against “what is” is not productive. I know because I’ve done a fair amount of it in my life. In those moments of frustration; step back, breathe, evaluate (what is?), and choose.
You give yourself many more options when you shift into “What is true here and what choices do I have?” You have more power when you get to the place of choice. It can be difficult to make that shift, especially when things are really going wrong. However, the more quickly you get yourself to that space, the easier it will be to make a choice rather than feeling like a victim. In this instance, I could be angry and frustrated that we were delayed, yet again, or I could embrace the mocha.
This week notice when you are feeling frustrated or angry. It might be with a spouse, a client, an employee, or even yourself. If you recognized what is true, what choices would you have? How would that change things? Would recognizing that you have choices help you take action? My new rallying cry to help me remember choices is, “Embrace the mocha!”
I missed my Nia class this morning, stuck in an expressway snafu – a crash had the Edens completely closed. I just spent two hours waiting for the exterminator to deal with my ant problem–he’s a no-show. And I won’t be seeing Tully today after all. I discovered belatedly that this newly reopened theater is now a Dine-In theater. We won’t be dining there. I feel like I have the reverse Midas Touch, today. Everything I touch turns to, well, not gold.
Apparently I need to go get a mocha so I can embrace it. Thanks for the reminder to put a positive spin on things.
Sounds like you had quite the day! I’m practicing feeling how I feel in the moment and then moving on rather than getting stuck in the, “Oh, no!” So often, in retrospect, I can see how things lined up perfectly. And then, other times, it just feels like the reverse Midas Touch with no rhyme or reason. Hence, the “practicing” on my part.
This is a very timely topic for me. I’ve noticed a default reaction that I have of jumping into victim/blame mode. I’ve been working on pushing the “pause” button and taking a step back so I can be more detached and objective. I’ve played with the idea of looking at the positive side of things — but it is not a natural process for me — yet! I’m looking forward to my transformation! 🙂 Thank you for sharing your experiences, Cindy!
There is so much power in the “pause.” I’m delighted to hear about your process. And, inherent in a process is that it isn’t an instant fix, it is one experience at a time. I also love that you have framed your process as playing with it, that takes off the pressure to be perfect.